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“I don’t like the way I sing”

25 Apr

I always happen to hear rueful stories about someone’s poor singing. Often people you would never guess at having any secret singing aspirations just open it up, puzzling you with an unexpected vulnerability. And when in the morning a successful business lady cried to me about not being able to sing and then over the lunch I had pretty the same talk with a nice young girl, a financial analytic this time, I was lost: why, is it of such a big difference to these ladies whether they sing or not?  And if they do want to sing why don’t they actually sing?…

 Having read, spied and speculated enough over this issue the picture is rather sad: it’s all about what we call to sing “good”, “beautiful”. Take some time to think: what is “beautiful singing” to you personally? Opera? Pop or rock singing? Maybe, it’s church choir or backyard guitar style that you fathom a model singing? We make our own careless judgments of beauty and impose them on others. Or we simply give in to imposing and then feel inadequate, groundlessly and rather stupid. Can you imagine that there are plenty of singing people that still think they are voiceless, failures, mediocre singers? It should not be this way.

 We’ll try to find the answer back in the past, free of stereotypes and all-inclusive consumerism. Once everybody: man and woman, young and old – were not ashamed to sing, and not because all of them had some solid musical background. There was no “right” singing model, exemplary and faceless. Singing was a natural outlet of emotions, feelings, thoughts. Being ashamed of your own singing was the same as feeling guilty for your tears when it hurts or laughter when you’re happy. When a guest or a wanderer from far away happened to come by everybody gathered around him and asked for a story – any story: his own or other. Most often even war-tempered, hardened men would start a song, whether sad or happy. “I can’t sing” was out of questioning: if you have something to say then you can sing.

It’s the very first step to get to love your voice, your singing, yet a tough one. It needs some thinking, rethinking, struggling over some issues. It’ll be easier afterwards – polishing your skills to perfection but it all starts right here…